Why me? Why do I count?

It was my Birthday this week!!!!!!! I am officially in my late 20's and it's fabulous!

I have been asking myself this question for a long time. I don't quite have the answer, well I have the answer but don't quite understand. While watching this video I wondered and marveled at all the worlds there are, and how amazing our Father in Heaven is that He could create such a magnificent universe, and what He must have in store for us. I felt excitement looking forward to the time that I will understand, that I will have my full memory back and be able to comprehend these worlds and how many spirits are in them. I also felt myself linger toward that same line of questioning that has stayed with me for several months now, "Why me? Why am I important? Why do You(God) care?"

I feel like I want to yell it out sometimes, WHY?! I want to understand why I am so important to His plan, this plan that is so perfect and so wonderful, why does He care that I make it to the Celestial Kingdom, why does He want me to be taken care of and happy? Why?......Why?

I can't comprehend it, I can't quite grasp that type of understanding, that kind of love and compassion. I do know however, with a deep understanding and assurance that He does in fact love me, that He cares about my having a bad day and needing a lift. He cares that I just spent the most amazing 15 minutes watching my beautiful children play and laugh and love each other. He knows what makes me happy, He knows what makes me sad, He knows where I need to go and what I need to do and who I need to serve, and how to parent my children so that I may make it through this life in success and happiness, and in turn to the Celestial Kingdom where we can all live together, for eternity.

I still can not tell you why, it brings me to tears each time I think of it, because I know He's just smiling and maybe saying, "because I do." Maybe it is the same way we love our children and why our children love us, we just do.

I am grateful for each blessing I am able to receive each and every day. Days are hard sometimes, but there is always an underlying factor that we often forget, that we are loved, needed and important.

I hope you have a testimony of the love of our Savior and our Heavenly Father, it is a comfort that can last a lifetime.

The gospel of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints is true, it is true. I have a testimony of this and could never deny it. I know that Jesus Christ is at the helm and we can receive inspiration from our Father Heaven and Jesus Christ through the Prophet, President Thomas S. Monson. I know our Savior lives, and that He suffered and died for each of us, that we may repent and live again, because He loves us. I know the Prophet Joseph Smith was a true prophet, I know he saw God and Jesus Christ and that he translated The Book of Mormon and that the fullness of the gospel is here again on the earth. We are here to gain a body and experience and be happy. "Adam fell that men might be; and men are, that they might have joy"- 2Nephi 2:25

I am truly grateful this sabbath day, to be with my family and to be in our home and enjoy the spirit that lingers with us. I hope you have had an equal experience this day, or sometime very soon. Love you all!

-Keara

Our house yesterday.

We woke up and went swimming at a friends house with a bunch of friends, it was a blast and the children were tired out....my favorite part of summer. wink

After swimming and naps the children ate some yogurt and graham crackers while I quickly cleaned up.

Calvy was not the most pleasant after his nap.

Caleb was just as cute as ever.

Ellie belly was her cute little self, playing games in her chair.

This was our front room after a quick cleaning.

Pandora playing Ingrid Michaelson.

Playroom area.

Bathroom with all the swimming suits and towels from swimming.

The kids room after a quick clean up.

Cloth diapers needing to be stuffed and put away. That green one is dirty.....haha.

Their cute little closet with jackets and shoes.

Bath towels hanging behind their door.

Calvy's rainbow hanging in the hallway.

My cute little vase from Goodwill.

ANd....my bedroom. Looking at this I realized how Mommy's neglect themselves, every other room is clean. Hmmm.

I took these pictures and I was debating whether or not to share them...I didn't want to because of all the healthy talk we've been having. But it was good to see, I can see where we are lacking lately. That is ice-cream, that will most honestly sit there for months until it goes bad, we like ice-cream, but just not a lot. Then there is frozen homemade sugar cookie dough, frozen veggies, meat, lemon popsicles homed and store bought. No more excuses, I now have to go to the grocery store. Bleh. Don't judge me.

Now before you judge, we do eat a lot of veggies and fruit, but I need to shop because we have eaten all of them. But yes, I do have store bought salad dressing and ketchup, whipped cream, Alan refuses to get rid of it, I personally do not like lard in an aerosol bottle.

Alan stopped off at the store a bought a few needed things.

My aprons, one of which my cute Mommy made for me.

Top of my fridge.

Kitchen......see my grocery list. wink

Nixon's gourmet meal, 24/7, 365 days a year. Poor guy. Looking into making my own dog food, anyone have any recipes?

Daddy came home and read stories to the children

While Nixon licked my feet. Gross toe, sorry, it's getting better though!

Caleb did this.

Then, they all played hopscotch on these..

Floor mats from the Cadi, Alan brought them in to vacuum.

Ellie sang the whole time the other jumped around. So Ellie.

And that was a part of yesterday in our home.

Hope you enjoyed!

~Keara

Give back

Blowing raspberries on my arm.

Okay, it seems I need to make a clarification. We were very strict on this diet. Let me just tell you how the last few days have done....

Little Cesar's

Chick-fil-A

Roman Noodles

Ritz Crackers

Chips with Cheese

deli meat

Oreo cookies

Chocolate chip cookies, and others I am sure. What I want you to realize is that I AM HUMAN, so do not think you have to live up to unreachable heights. I also wanted to point out that it was a bit of an emergency situation that I had to go on a sugarless diet. I was very ill and needed a change, so I was very strict and quite miserable for 3 very long months. I think it is good to take sugar out of your diet, or to lessen it. I think if you do it for 2 weeks strictly that your body will go through a detox and you will feel great! It is hard, but extremely worth it, it is a great test and practice to self control.

I am NO dietitian, so please do not follow me blindly, do your own research and see what is best for your body.

On another note, we bought a new car(well new to us) a few weeks back and felt that it was the wrong decision. We prayed for guidance in how to fix it, or what we should do. Yesterday we received a text from the family we bought it from, asking us if we liked the car, Alan told them our predicament and they told us the best news EVER! They have a friend that would like to buy it from us for the exact amount we paid for it. The Lord is amazing, not only did He make it possible for us to fix our mistake, we didn't lose anything and it happened quickly for us, we sell it tomorrow. I am so grateful for a Father in Heaven who loves me and knows my wants and desires and cares to help me with them. We are grateful for such a blessing.

My toe is healing up nicely, it feels good to feel normal again, to be able to get up and wash dishes and clean up a bit without having to sit every 5 minutes. It is still pretty sore, but getting much better. I am truly grateful for this blessing as well.

Life is wonderful, it has it's ups and it's downs, but amidst all the crying, the hitting, the mistakes, the dirty laundry, dirty dishes, empty cupboards, and just plain feeling down, we have a Heavenly Father, He cares, He loves us and wants us in this life to be truly happy.

Say your prayers, give thanks and remember the good things at the end of the day, not the bad. And don't forget to do service, I did some odd chores for a friend in her home today, and it made all the difference.

"When Ye Are in the Service

of Your Fellow Beings Ye Are Only in the

Service of Your God" -Mosiah 2:17

After scriptures and bed time Calvy stops me before I close the door, and while half asleep and still facing the wall next to his bed says,

"Mom, means brass?"

"What do you mean?"

"What's brass mean?"

"Its a type of metal, like gold or silver, or ......metal.(haha, I'm very intelligent) Nephi wrote on the plates of brass and Joseph Smith translated them into The Book of Mormon."

3 mintues later

Ellie comes out of her bed(not unusual), I put her back in and before I can leave the room she says...

"Mom, I have a question wait."

"What is it Ellie?"

"What means light?"

Moral: kids really do listen and think, and they also like to find many ways to not have to go to bed. ;0)

Nite!

-Keara

Isms and weight loss

Calvy's crazy skills.

Look Mom! I'm eating a yellow watermelon!

Yes, he is the cutest...in case you were wondering.

Calvy giving his very first talk, he did awesome! He hiccuped through the WHOLE thing, it was so cute. I almost video taped it, but felt weird enough taking pictures with my phone. wink
Good 'ol family. They were beat after a hot day and then watching our crazy three, we were all ready for a nap in Nauvoo.

Calvy practicing his photography skills.

My cutie girl with her new outfit she got at our girls day out.

This little chick helped herself to the watermelon on the counter....I hadn't cut it yet. She ate every last drop, that was our dinner.

While cleaning up some make-up off of my trash can lid in my bedroom, that Ellie had split...I'm not even going to tell you how many days previous, Calvy came over and asked what I was doing...

"Why did she do that?

Maybe she was trying to make, Trash Can Make-up Pie. That's gross. Why would she do that?"

I couldn't help it, in the moment this was so funny, and it didn't help that I was already trying really hard just to scrub it off, him saying this while I was working hard threw me over the edge, I fell to the floor laughing. This kid, I tell ya he's gonna be famous someday.

Ellie brought me a big wad of flowers, bows and magnets and said "here". I asked her why she was playing with them and told her she knew she wasn't supposed to be playing with them. She said, "I made them pretty for you, so you could have them." What the heck do you say to that kind of explanation from a cute 2.5 year old? I said, "Thank you baby, that was so nice." Hmmmm, think I failed?

Honestly life is fun right now, Caleb is starting to think about walking, he stands all by himself and laughs when we see him, and then falls. It's hard at times too, Ellie and Caleb both have thrush, which is NO fun. I have a slight case myself, but not in my mouth....I'm still nursing, and that is as far as the hints will go. I thought again about weening him, but I can't get myself to do it, I have never had such a hard time with breastfeeding, and yet I can't seem to want to get rid of it. Anywho back to thrush, we went to the Dr. to confirm it is infect thrush and she gave us an RX for an anti-fungal. We are doing doTERRA Essential Oils right now to try and get rid f it and they seem to be working, so I don't think we'll need that RX. I will be doing a Candida Cleanse and I'm pretty excited about it. I am thankful for great friend who jump at the chance to help you. We are so blessed with SO many good friends, I will miss this time of our lives.

Before

After(I realize this is a bad after picture, but I honestly couldn't find anything else)

Before

After (in a size 2 jean that were even a little big) Sad story, by upper half of my WOMANLY body was the first thing to go, had to buy a new bra. ;0(

I am going to post about my weightless, only because my cute sister told me I should. I told her that I hadn't said anything because I didn't want people to think that I was bragging or anything. I am really grateful for how healthy look and feel and I attribute it to GREAT NUCCA Chiropractic care and my healthy lifestyle. Since my NO sugar diet we are very conscious about what we put into our bodies. We eat very little processed food, mostly fresh veggies and fruit. We have also cut down on our meat, and when we do we eat fresh from the butcher organic meat(when we can find all organic) usually chicken or turkey, very little red meat if any. We try to eat meat only twice a week, some weeks are better than others. It's actually fun, like a game to see how many meals or days I can go without eating meat. Once we started thinking about it we realized that we used to eat meat with almost every meal. If we were to go back to that I think I would puke. We drink water and very little juice or soda, if we do have soda it's usually carbonated fruit juice, like Izze's. So we have very little sugar in our diet, we substitute with Agave and Stevia. We eat plain Greek yogurt flavored with stevia and pineapple juice, and the kids LOVE it, I do too. All in all it is not a diet to lose weight, we just wanted to be healthier and weight loss was a side-effect. We feel great and free, honestly. We still eat the fun stuff sometimes, but not very often, we are not perfect and we aren't Nazzi's about it, but it is important to us so we try hard. Just to prove that we are not perfect...I had a few bites of chocolate ice-cream last night and few swigs of chocolate milk, and I hate to admit it but I did have a handful of Ranch style dorritos and ham on my sandwich today, so we aren't perfect. I realize this may say dumb, like it's not really cheating, but I'm telling you once you are off that sugar for even a week your body changes, you don't want it so much any more, which is good because sugar is one of the most toxic food additives it really is not good for your body. When I cut sugar out, after a week I was dying to have chic fil-a and went out and got some nuggets. They were SO gross I can't even tell you, I couldn't taste anything but the sugar, it actually burned my throat. I'm telling you sugar is in everything, because it's addicting, so it makes everything taste better, just look at your labels, I'll bet you find it in the ingredients, and if it's one of the first ingredients I wouldn't eat it.

WOW, I so just got into a lesson, sorry. Long story short, we are healthier than ever and look better than ever too. Alan has lost close to 20lbs and I am down to a size 2, haven't been a size 2 since my freshman year of HS. It feels really good, I hope you try it out. I'll try get a picture up, I am always behind the camera so I'll have Alan take over and get a few.

Try it for a week, you will NOT regret it. I won't lie, it is hard, but so worth it.

Don't eat:

-white anything, rice, flour, potatoes

-sugar, in any form

-too much fruit, like one a day

-too many carbs, like 2-3x's a week

Eat:

-Lots of fresh veggies cooked or raw

-water

-plain greek yogurt

-protien

-Brown rice

-Wheat bread/flour unbleached flour

READ LABELS!

Just for a week, try it. And download this to help encourage you and your kiddies. wink

"healthy natural food all day" You'll be singing it too.

-Keara

It's ok, you can be honest...

This is Alan and I just after we got out of Brian Regan. Best night! So fun!

Our Ellie in the mornings.

Chubbalub loves watermelon. I'm pretty sure jobba the hut did too. Hahaha!

Calvy playing golf...sort of.

Am I the worst Mom ever?

This week was a special week for my little guy, Caleb, it is his Birthday this week. It is his first Birthday...shouldn't that one be a really fun one? A momentous occasion? Yah, we didn't do anything to celebrate, the funniest part about it is our neighbors from upstairs, whom we have just met, came over a brought him an amazing Birthday gift, complete with a balloon. Seriously, we had forgotten it was even his Birthday. Apparently Alan sang to him the morning of, but we rushed out the door for another post-op appointment for me and that night when we were supposed to have a cake for him to just dig into, we ended up eating pizza and breadsticks and I rushed out the door for a singing practice at a friends house(I'm singing at a funeral Thursday). Seriously, I think this may qualify me for a bad Mother award. Hmm. I decided I am going to "fix it", even though he has no clue what a Birthday even is, and we are going to do something special, maybe this weekend.....this cast and hurt foot really put a damper on things, it is impossible to get anything done from the couch! Haha!

On the subject of my foot, I decided to take my cast off this evening and try walking on just my bandaged foot. It is crazy how I have already forgotten how to walk on it. I have hardly anything strength in it, my knee kept giving out and I walk funny. It doesn't help that the whole time I'm walking I'm thinking, "I probably look like a duck. Man I hope I don't split a stitch. I wonder what my neighbors think of me. They think I'm a fake, who only wears a cast out in public, to get sympathy. I hope I don't fall on my face."

I found out today at my appointment that the toxicology report came back. I am not sure the exact term, but he gave me the "you have 2 months to live" look. It came back as Rheumatoid Arthritis...mass or something like that. He asked if I have a history of that, which I have no clue, I only have one grandparent living and honestly I don't think my parents have had any issues. IDK. Either way Dr. L says I should be tested for it, but until then I am going to continue my NUCCA Chiropractic care and be positive about my health and go from there. ;0)

I feel it is a blessing, in some weird way. It helps me appreciate my working body, ad the times that I am healthy and strong. It humbles me and reminds me of how much I really do need my Father in Heaven, I rely on him for so much and I am grateful for these times that I am able to sit back and remember that. I know He loves me and knows me and cares for me. I know He knows and loves my children, and I can gain inspiration on how to raise them, and give them exactly what they need, at the time they need it. I am grateful for these life experiences, truly I am grateful.

Go here to learn more about my beliefs and other members stories.

Some truly funny things the children have said lately.

Calvy and I were sitting pretty close talking and in the middle of our conversation he says, "You look funny with those lines."

"What lines?"

"These ones"

"These ones?"

"Yah, those ones around your mouth"

"Those are my smile lines."

"You look funny."

Thanks

My children have the best conversations while traveling in the backseat of the car.

E: "When I was a baby, I ate Daddy booby."

C: "Daddy's don't have boobies."

E: "Daddy had boobies too. When he talks like a girl he doesn't talk like Daddy."

C: "No, only Mommies have boobies....but not all mommies."

IDK

C: "I want a racing motorcycle, and mine can be Lightning Mcqueen and be super fast, and yours can be.....flowers.(flowers is said in high pitched, trying to convince you it's cool, sort of way)

E: "No, I want mine to be baby."

C: "Okay, yours can be baby."

These are some of the things Calvy and Ellie say to me from the backseat.

Calvy:

"Mom, I need a hang glider."

"I wonder if my voice will sound different when I'm five"

"Mom, remember when we lived in that house. And you hit a boy. And he was big. And it was me?"

Ellie:

"You made me stop. You can't make me stop, I need to talk."

Apparently I cut her off before she was done.

"Calvy's not a mom, you're a mom, there's not two mom's there's only one mom."

I would say I'm sorry for telling you so many, but I know this is why most of you read my blog, to hear these isms. It's a good thing too, because I have a few more for ya.

Daddy: "Why did you do that?"

E: "Because I was sad."

D: "Why were you sad?"

E: "Because I wanted to punch his cheek."

Commenting on my driving:

C: "Mom, you're awesome at this."

M: "Hahahaha!"

C: "Mom, awesome is not funny, awesome is cool."

M: " Oh, thank you."

C: "You're welcome Mom."

I was recording myself saying the funny things they say so I wouldn't forget, and Ellie asked what I was doing and Calvy said, "Mommy's just trying to remember the cool things that I say."

Today we were watching some Youtube videos on the Mormon Channel, and at the end of one video Calvy said, "Girls smile the best Mommy."

I think so too.

Thanks for stopping by guys! Hope you have a great night!

-Keara